I haven't written much about my personal life in this blog but I need to speak now. Both my parents are going through some health challenges. My father has been dealing with deteriorating kidneys for about a year and now is awaiting a transplant.
My Mom started phase two of her battle with Cancer on this past Monday, chemotherapy. Mom is a trooper and a survivor. She tackles challenges as they come and does an amazing job of not worrying about things she can't control. Of course the first response of most people is that she is only masking her fear. Sadly those that think the previous statement to be are the weak and scared; projecting their fear on to her in the hopes that everyone can sit around wallowing in fear and uncertainty. Bottom line, I believe my Mom honestly thinks like a winner and a fighter. She believes life is to be lived and not worried about. I also share her philosophy about life and know life is only as awesome as I make it.
So far this week Mom has had little to no problems, but today she is facing her first hurdle. When I called she sounded different from previous days. Upon inquiring I found she has been battling the nausea today. So far she has not dealt with the nasty nausea side effect; we almost thought she might sail through without too much trouble. She told me she would try to eat some toast and I felt helpless. What can I do? Nothing really.
Today I felt the emotions well up within me when I thought of my Mom at home going through this. It something that none of us in her life can understand or relate to. All we can do is ensure she knows we are all there for her if she needs something from us that we can actually do. We can't take the nausea away, we can't take the pain away. Giving is our primary purpose; to give of ourselves in whatever form she needs.
I know the Lord is watching over her and through us is doing his work to help her through this. I also know He can't take away the physical side effects of chemotherapy any more than I can. If that were the case the cancer cells in her body would not have grown. One of my favorite dialogues about how God helps us went something like this: "Let me ask you something. If someone prays for patience, do you think God gives them patience? Or does He give them the opportunity to be patient? If someone prayed for courage, does God give them courage, or does He give them opportunities to be courageous? If someone prayed for their family to be closer, do you think God zaps them with warm fuzzy feelings, or does He give them opportunities to love each other?" I believe if we ask for God's help He won't simply tap us on the shoulder and fix the problem. He provides us opportunity. He does His works through others who can bring the opportunities to us and He empowers us to grow. We are all a vessel of the Lord, although some of us make it easier for Him to channel His love and guidance than others. Whether He works through the lady at the bus stop who says hello to you on a day you prayed for peace in the World or He guides the doctor's skillful hands on the day of an important surgery, He surrounds, He binds us and He loves us.
I know that in my absence He is around to ensure Mom gets what she needs from the vessels He can use to touch her life.
The battle with Cancer has just begun but we have the best DAMN army helping Mom fight the good fight!
On Mother's Day don't forget to hug your Mom, she deserves it.
My Two Cents
Jamie
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