Impact of a Feather

It's Thursday. The day is dragging along at the usual snail's pace. Clickety clack is the predominant sound filling the air as my crime fighting (and by crime fighting I mean ridding the World of annoying Computer problems) co-workers type away on their keyboards. I presume typing about work…just like I am! Oh the funny I spew forth!

A week or so ago everything seemed to be moving along nicely until a speed bump seems to have sent me off the rail. I was supposed to meet a friend for lunch. Seems simple enough and relatively harmless. He canceled on me, which in of itself isn't a big deal. I know he is busy and this is fairly normal for him. I've come to expect it more than be surprised by it.
But, here in lies the rub. What impact am I having on people in my life? I tried to limit the drama to slightly below queen status, however, I simply could not ignore the facts. Time and time again I am being passed over for other events, people, or whatever better offer is looming on the horizon. Either I am a terrible person that nobody wants to spend time with or my loyalty and friendship is being taken for granted. I have to believe it is the second option; mostly because I know I am not a terrible person and quite frankly I am a good person, with integrity. So what gives? Is it that they are so comfortable with knowing I'm in their corner that little effort is required to maintain that bond? I guess the problem is, they are right. Loyal to a fault.
It may seem like one simple lunch, but it is hundreds of lunches, movies, parties or whatever I've invited people to in the past. It is just getting more and more difficult to find someone to say yes to a cup of coffee! I hear the same thing universally from people; "Ya, we should get together! It would be fun!" or "We should do this more often" or "Call anytime and we'll set something up". But unless I call, I swear I would never hear from them again. So again I ask what is my impact on people. My impact must be so powerful that I must maintain consistent week to week contact with someone or I would never hear from them again?? My impact is in fact, non-existent. Apparently I make a lot of noise, but nobody is listening.It's truly amazing, if I make noise and stay on the radar nobody hears me, but if I go quiet everyone sits up and says what's wrong with Jamie and where did he go? Which would lead me to believe that as long as I am appearing okay everyone will simply go about their business and get to me when they have time. Here's an interesting piece of information…..if you don't make time for people (yourself included) before you know it years have pasted and you wish you had them back,
Here's a news flash. I'm not fine! Unless of course you mean Frazzled Insecure Neurotic and Emotional, then fine I am. No worries though, I got it, I'm managing to work through it on my own. No need to squeeze me in to your busy schedule. Please don't misunderstand I'm not angry, I just have taken inventory and understand a few things more clearly, which of course should help resolve some of the lingering skeletons in the closet. My loyalty and integrity have not wavered. I feel very strongly about who my friends are. Rest assured I'm not going anywhere and when you have time, however long in to the future that may be, I will be in the same place you last saw me…..by your side.

My Two Cents
Jamie

Rules To Live By; Forces You To Stop And Think

In my reading I came across this intriguing list of "rules" for life as a human being. If you do not consider yourself human you can excuse yourself from reading further. I found myself reading one rule and pausing to think about the rule in depth. To say the least it was thought provoking, if not the cold hard truth.

I tried to label some of the rules as having more impact then the others, but I couldn't. They are all so very true. Number seven did stop me dead in my tracks and had me re-evaluating a number of things. It is a strong and bold statement. It requires a great deal of thought to see how it is true, but slowly I have come to understand.

These rules will be placed on my refrigerator for all to see. Hopefully someone sees some worth and changes something for the better. Here is the list:


Life and Business Coach, Cherie Carter-Scott (author of "If Success is a Game, These are the Rules") came up with these "Ten Rules for Being Human".

1. You will receive a body. You may like it or hate it, but it's yours to keep for the entire period.

2. You will learn lessons. You are enrolled in a full-time informal school called, "life."

3. There are no mistakes, only lessons. Growth is a process of trial, error, and experimentation. The "failed" experiments are as much a part of the process as the experiments that ultimately "work."

4. Lessons are repeated until they are learned. A lesson will be presented to you in various forms until you have learned it. When you have learned it, you can go on to the next lesson.

5. Learning lessons does not end. There's no part of life that doesn't contain its lessons. If you're alive, that means there are still lessons to be learned.

6. "There" is no better a place than "here." When your "there" has become a "here", you will simply obtain another "there" that will again look better than "here."

7. Other people are merely mirrors of you. You cannot love or hate something about another person unless it reflects to you something you love or hate about yourself.

8. What you make of your life is up to you. You have all the tools and resources you need. What you do with them is up to you. The choice is yours.

9. Your answers lie within you. The answers to life's questions lie within you. All you need to do is look, listen, and trust.

10. You will forget all this.

As you can see; some serious stuff. I don't suggest picking and choosing rules. I would suggest a long serious discussion with yourself to evaluate each point individually to ensure honest answers are achieved.

Good thought provoking list.

My Two Cents (or one cent and the other is stolen)

Jamie Cinq-Mars

Getting Out Of Bed.....It's A Choice

Recently I read a quote that got me thinking. The quote was referencing personal choice and its impact on the World.

By making the simple choice of getting out of bed in the morning (and it is a choice) you impact everyone you come in contact with that day. That is a very powerful concept, if you truly think about it. Every single person you interact with during each day has an impact. The concept of choice is a snowball effect. As you make your way out of bed and into your day you are faced with choices every second of the day. Think about this....a simple choice like the coffee shop, which ever one you choose to stop at changes the entire dynamic of everyone else there at the time you arrive and for an extended period of time after you leave. Your choice made the line one person longer, which may translate into the difference between someone behind you in line being late or on time. Had you chose a different coffee shop or to not stop at all you have an equally distinct impact on the people at that coffee shop. The power of choice is fantastically amazing. Even choosing NOT to do something you still have an impact. Powerful stuff.

What I find interesting is how this gift given to us by God has been the World’s greatest ally and the World's greatest defeat. All other animals live and react to its surroundings based on instinct. We as humans live and react based on choice. The ability to choose sets us apart from all others of God’s creations. We can choose to react a certain way to a situation. Naturally over time learned behavior becomes routine and is accredited to an involuntary reaction (habit), yet it began as a choice. It is this choice that has created such division is the World. The mass differences in the religions of the World. I don't think God intended there to be such a huge downside to giving us the gift of choice. Because He works from the position of good and believed people would choose good versus bad, right versus wrong, He bestowed upon us a powerful gift. In essence God’s greatest accomplishment was also His greatest failure. Adam chose to eat the apple. When He was shown even Adam could not resist the enticing encouragement of the Devil; the Lord knew His creation of man in likeness of Himself could not handle the responsibility of the gift called choice. I suppose that is why He sent us His only Son. God could see the gift of choice would not be handled as well as He hoped. He assumed the gift would be used for good. Sadly we now face a World where people don't believe (by choice) and for those of us who do we have to work hard to defend our right to choose belief. I choose to allow Him to work through me in any way He needs to get His message out. He even wants work to be done on behalf of non-believers, because He will believe in man long after they CHOOSE to give up on Him. Because choice is so powerful He believes all His children can choose to come back to Him and invite Him to live in their heart and do His work through them. All He wants to is help His children be happy, but because they have choice in their lives He cannot do anything more than be a guide, without an invitation and faith He is unable to help in His fullest capacity.

What I hope you take from this is not a message about God and becoming a believer, but rather a message about the importance of the choices you make EVERY SINGLE MINUTE OF EVERY SINGLE DAY and their impact on the World around you. Every smile you share you make the World a better place, at least for a short time. It is hard work hard to make choices that make your World a better place (sounds funny, but it seems do much easier to be a grouch). If everyone worked at making their immediate World a better place then eventually all the good being done would start overlapping and create more happiness. Be positive and understand the POWER you possess with each and every choice you make everyday. Remember I am not talking about the big major choices, like whether to give a homeless guy food, I am talking about the little choices you make each and every day, like whether or not you smile at one another or how you answer the question "How are you?" or how you react to a frustrating event. Your reaction to any one event is a choice. Try choosing best possible path each time you make a choice. Understand that your mood and attitude are also a choice. You choose how you are going to face each and every day. It is up to you. What is your choice today?

God Bless,
Jamie Cinq-Mars