Technology Curfew?

   Being a parent of a preteen or teenager in 2010 is not like anyone could have truly predicted 20 - 25 years ago. Think back for a moment, a brief one, as to how we communicated with our friends. Internet? What's the Internet? We had no cell phones, no text messages, no instant messages and certainly no Internet and if we had Internet (in our later teens) we certainly did not have the Internet in the palm of our hands! The Internet seemed to be reserved for the rich and famous or the school computer lab; you know this Internet thing is just a fad right?!? No, we had to make a phone call, from a phone attached to a cord! Of course we only could make that call if we were given permission from our parents and our time was limited.

   This small stroll down memory lane isn't intended to appear as a complaint or a longing for simpler times; not at all. No diatribes about how I walked ten miles in six feet of snow, uphill both ways to school here. But this sure begs the question, "What frame of reference does a parent (do I have) in 2010 to the unique environment our young people find themselves in?" Let's face it, we have no clue what it's like to be a teenager living in an instant 24/7 access World. How are we expected to know how to be a parent or how to "govern" this technological World our kids are growing up in? I know the same complaints are made by all parents from generation to generation. We get stuck trying to compare our teenage years to theirs and wonder why the same set of rules we grew up with don't seem to work or apply here. Seriously, the advent of the TV and it's like technology did not have the same type of impact on the teenagers of it's time, as the Internet is and will continue to have on it's generation. The exponential advancements in technology have changed everything about what it means to become a teenager. A paradigm shift if you will...

    In an effort to give our kids as much freedom as we're comfortable with, helping them to grow up and learn to be responsible, we try to supply them access to the technology available. At the same time, hopefully not giving them more then they can handle. Basically we need to perform a perfect juggling act.

Enter here: the BIG World of technology. 

   Technology surrounds our teenagers, freedom is everywhere whether we are there to guide them or not. 24/7 access is a very real possibility and I wonder if the teenagers of the 21st century are ready for it. I know, like all teenagers, they think they are invincible! It has to be overwhelming though for a child hitting puberty. It has to be! Everything in their life is changing, all at once and at break neck speeds. New school, new friends, body changes, new freedoms, the list is long and technology just adds a very interesting dynamic to the mix. 

   That is the challenge, isn't it. How do 21st century parents protect their children without being crowned the technology police, unreasonable, over protective, outrageous or simply unfair? A high wire act without a net, set over a bed of explosives if I ever saw one. Parents be warned.

   Looking back, for my youth, week night curfews seemed to work. It  brought the kids home and had them unwind before getting to bed on a school night. If after curfew we had to talk to a friend we initiated the chess match that was determining how long we could talk on the phone. Ya see, call waiting wasn't available so us being on the phone meant no one could call the house! This game's degree of difficulty was greatly increased by the factor known as "a sibling". Now although curfews are in place for my teenager to have him home at a reasonable hour during the week; it just isn't the same. With the addition of cell phone calls and texting, along with iPod touches with WiFi access to the Internet; my teenager isn't really "home" even after he walks through the door. Its not entirely his fault, we provided him the technology, he is simply using the devices placed in his hands.

   These devices we introduced as tools for us as parents to offer more freedom. Freedom given because we can have instant access to them. In addition, technology is also a tool used to teach responsibility to our teens. Problem now is, it has also created a potential for disaster too. To combat the potential problems and overwhelming concept of "always on communications" we have added a technology curfew on school nights. This seemed like a viable solution that was pretty fair, I'd say. Again, I have no concept of what it is like being a teenage boy with all this "stuff" at my finger tips. Thank God, I went back to school to be educated about the technologies of the 21st century. I thought I went back to school to start a new career, I'm beginning to think it may have been just to have a hot clue what my kids are dealing with!! This curfew (no cell phone, no iPod, no computer after a certain time) should provide an opportunity for him to slow down and relax before bed; thus improving his sleep. A bonus is actually having him "home" for a portion of the evening we us. Surprising to me was his reaction. He actually felt this to be fair. We had a long conversation that felt a lot less like Dad suppressing his son and more like a friend honestly looking out for a friend. I think he got "it". I suspect he too found the continuous access his friends have a pain and this way it's easier to blame his parents and their stupid rules. The alternative would be for him to ask his friends to back off, but that isn't easy for a growing teenager.

   Even though that went well...I am still struggling with how I handled it. My fear and concern for him as he continues his journey towards becoming a man is not going to be lessened by one success. In an effort to do right by my kids I am constantly questioning if I made the right decision about nearly everything. Which sucks! HaHa! Oh well, the next three to five years are going to be tough on me, I wonder if they will understand that; as this chapter of our lives unfolds. I hope so...

My Two Cents

Jamie

Don't Blink...Children Grow Up Right Before Your Eyes

Kids grow up so fast. My goodness. Mini He has just turned 12 and when the hell did that happen?

It was a big year this year. He started Grade 7, which means he left the only school he has ever known for the big bad domain of high school! Although he is only in middle school, his junior high school is housed within a high school, from 7 to 12 he is in the same school, he is on his own in a much bigger World. What a change from having complete input and involvement to being so far removed it is like he is schooling on Mars.
Mini He's mother and I are both working hard and keeping the lines of communication open as much as possible. Mini He is a really good kid. He has a great head on his shoulders. He likes to be crazy, but he understands what is right and what is wrong, we can only hope he sticks to the plan.
I was faced with a HUGE situation this week, stemming from all things new this school year. Mini He is meeting new kids and I don't like it! I know it sounds nuts, but he has known the same group of kids for seven years and I just yesterday got truly comfortable with them! I kid, I have been proud of Mini He's choices regarding friends for a long time. He has a great core group of friends and I know their parents and I couldn't ask for a better group. So what is problem, right?
Well this new boy has joined the fray and it is making me uneasy. I don't know what to do, trust him or string him up. I have been hearing this boy's name over and over for the past couple weeks and it makes me nervous. I haven't met him or his parents, I am out of the loop! Man it is hard. This new kid out of no where was asking to borrow Mini Me's coveted possessions and requiring us us to deliver it! Something in my brain snapped and I could not think straight. In one full swoop I could not get the idea out of my head that this new kid was taking advantage of Mini He's good nature and natural willingness to be a good person. The plan was for him to borrow the item and return it the next day at school. Sounds simple enough, right? I went crazy. The lecture was on (I really need to stop doing that) and he was in full weather the storm mode, firing back his standard response of "I know". It was horrible, I was horrible. Poor kid, both of them, were in my cross hairs. The feeling of complete loss of control was overwhelming. I needed to regain control over his life in some way. Very, very sad.
In the end I was very wrong for losing my mind. Two days later (on his birthday) I was blessed with the opportunity to spend some unscheduled time with Mini He on a trip to the doctor's office. I took this time to apologize for my over reaction and to tell him I was sorry. You see, I think he can learn that although at times one may over react, it is very important to recognize mistakes and admit to them. I explained how I had not been fair to the boy and I also wasn't fair to him either. I expressed my sincere admission to being a little too protective. I tried to have him fully understand that I need to trust him more. Trust that everything we have tried to teach him as he grew up, he would continue to lean on. Trust that he would continue to be a good kid, be a leader in bringing new kids into his circle of friends and the whole time being sure to protect himself and the person he wants to be known as. I seems like such a large amount of responsibility for a 12 year old, but he is suddenly on his own for more than eight hours a day now. He has to get to class on time, he has to work hard in school and he has to co-exist in a school of hundreds all by himself. Scary stuff for both him and his parents. I, along with other adult influences in his life, have worked hard at trying to teach him how to be a good person and at some point we were going to have to allow our teachings be his guide, thus letting go.
As a parent you can never really know when that day will come; the only thing that we can do is continue to prepare them for the big day. Mini He's progress to independence began long ago, but this new year in Grade 7 sure has been a rude awakening. After my conversation with Mini He on his birthday I feel we both learned something. I believe he understands that I love him (I do tell him that frequently) and only worry about him because of that love. Surprisingly I think he understands it in spite of my crazy ways! He knows I want him to be safe, happy and experiencing life. I am very proud of this young man, he has made good decisions thus far. I don't really see any reason for him to stray from his current path; mostly because he knows I will be monitoring his path fairly closely. I don't think that is a bad thing. Kids respond to EXACTLY the level you give them. If they are given a little room to make mistakes and learn; that is exactly what they do. If they are bubble wrapped and never aloud to experience the pitfalls and joys of making decisions then they always need your help and letting them grow up is much more difficult for both parties.

No one ever said being parent and raising children would be easy. And anyone who thinks it is has never had kids of their own. It just isn't the same if your blood isn't flowing through their veins.

My Two Cents
Jamie

When Giving Equals Taking Away

It’s ironic. We, as this generation of parents, want to provide so much for our children, but is our desire to “give our kids a better life than we had” putting their potential for greatness in jeopardy? Time and time again we see some of the most powerful, influential and successful people in the World having come from very meager or impoverished backgrounds. Take Oprah Winfrey, she battled through some extremely difficult years in her young life; from abandonment to sexual abuse, until finally being reunited with her father who instilled a powerful work ethic in her and provided her the support to do great things. Another example would be Jim Carrey, albeit not a powerful media mogul like Oprah has become, Jim Carrey still has found success after living a portion of his life living with his family in their car. The point is this; history is supposed to teach us something. If you look back on the early years of some of favorite stars, famous people or influential leaders we will often find poverty and hardship. We find they have faced adversity square in the eye and found a way to battle through to emerge a winner. What do we offer our children? Everything and anything they ask for, with a side helping of protective bubble to round out the offer!

Does the phrase “I want to give my child a better life than I had” ring any bells? It should. You hear it repeatedly from parents all over North America. But by giving them a “better life” are we robbing them of their future potential? Shouldn't we be teaching the valuable lessons adversity taught us? I think the problem lies in the subjective phrase a better life; how can we define a better life. The only way we can actually provide a better life is to use a time machine and bring our kids back to the point in time we were of childhood age and raise them there, carving out a better path. Our children live in a different time then we did and cannot offer a better life based on what we deem as a terrible childhood. Think about what you are saying when you proclaim your goal to be, giving your children a better life…you are openly saying your childhood was terrible. Was it truly that bad that you need to provide so much better? I wonder how children are to realize how difficult life can be at times when they never face an adversity or have to own up to responsibility within their lives. As parents we do everything for them. The biggest issue is trying to eliminate their risk and potential for danger at every turn. We try to ensure they don’t get hurt, whether it is physically or emotionally. Is this really giving them a better life than we had? I don’t think so; I think the tough times we faced as kids are what shaped us into what we are today. Our freedom to make mistakes and learn from them helped us understand how to succeed. Also our ability to manage some risk on our own was huge in developing our ability to discern normal risk vs. dangerous risk. I think we are creating a generation of soon to be adults who will not have a clue how to live in the real World. A World where mommy isn’t there to hug you a nanosecond after you bump your knee. A World that isn’t going to give you everything you want simply because you “need” it and a World that will be unforgiving and harsh when they make mistakes. If they are taught how to accept mistakes as a necessity of the learning process and realize that the standard bumps and bruises in life do not require extended periods of time to recover (coddling), then our children will be better equipped to take on any challenge they see fit tackle. I think the mention of Oprah’s father providing support was a key point. Support should be based on the needs of the person facing the challenge NOT the person providing the support. Unconditional support is what you want to aim for. I have said it before; we are all capable of achieving anything our greatest support believes we can.

Basically some of greatest leaders and influential people we look up to did not have everything handed to them, nor were they afforded the opportunity to fly through life without accountability and in fact some battled through some pretty heinous conditions. The Oprahs of the World were bred out of a necessity to do honest, hard work to achieve greatness. They were forced to find their own inner strength (which I believe we are all born with) to persevere through obstacles which set them up for making the leap from a difficult life to a success to an icon. There was no magic formula, simply school of hard knocks learning with a healthy addition of a supportive role model. The supportive role model is the key factor in most cases. Naturally I am not suggesting children need to be beat or emotionally destroyed to be great individuals one day, however, I am suggesting that children need to understand life can be a rough ride at times and MUST be given the chance to discover their own inner strength as children to allow them to parlay that into a functional understanding of their survival skills long before they ever really need them. I am also suggesting we step out of the role of SUPER PARENT protector of children from all that may hurt them as soon as we can and assume the most critical role you will play in your life, #1 supporter. Children will feel safe no matter where life takes them or how far away they are if they ALWAYS know their #1 fan is going to be just that.

My Two Cents

Jamie

It’s Amazing How We Miss Them

I couldn't resist another short blog today about my kids, humor me to ensure I remain sane!

My kids have been out in the wonderful World of Mickey and Goofy for the past week with their Mom. I have been very excited for them as this trip approached. I expect to hear all kinds of stories of fun and craziness. I didn't expect I would miss them so much! DAMN! They return today and I am beside myself.

I find myself tracking their flight back and impatiently awaiting their return. I know they will be home later this evening, but I am not sure how to get from now to then without going nuts! It isn't like I haven't been away from them for extended periods of time or something or that I am worried about them. Perhaps their age has something to do with it? They are at that cusp age for truly enjoying Disneyworld. Not too old to not be able to be a kid and not too young to not remember any of the great things they will experience.

But needless to say I am excited they are coming home and can't wait to hear about their trip.

My Two Cents

Jamie

Don’t Worry Be Happy

Somewhere down this winding road I call life I have lost something. I don't remember when I lost it or where but it appears to be gone. I do remember, once upon a time, having it and I guess I took it for granted. I am unsure if the loss was a gradual process or if I woke up one day and it was gone. I would have to speculate it was a slow decent; hardly noticeable to the naked eye, otherwise I am sure I would have taken steps to avoid the loss of something so important. I see others around possess it; especially the children, so clearly it isn't something I made up. I know I had it at one point. Children are the best example I can possibly give, they possess such a raw version that I think we could all learn from.

I have lost my ability to be happy about something good happening in my life; to let my hair down (so to speak) and be genuinely happy about an event. That euphoric moment when you first discover something where everything else in the World for brief time is gone and the discovery envelopes your mind, body and soul; you become flushed and the smile you wear is involuntary, you know that moment. Now to be fair and clear, I do laugh a great deal, however, it is based on a healthy sense of humor. I love comedy and thoroughly enjoy making people laugh. But when it comes to something happening to me that should produce a happiness that makes me smile and pump my fist in raw emotion; something in my brain misfires. The strange part is, I can clearly see and appreciate the good aspects and can feel the excitement inside, and somehow the excitement is held in check. Like a damper being closed ever so slowly to allow some of the excitement to flow through but not too much! Very, very controlled. It sucks! At the same time I can also see and feel the hurdles that are attached to the potential for happiness which could very well be the damper I spoke of. It seems I am always in analytical mode; breaking down all the angles and all the outs. Visualizing the potential, possibility for growth, and the areas that could post a problem; then continue the visual to include possible solutions to the potential pitfalls to ensure a smooth transition in to happiness! Sounds sickening doesn't it? Always thinking and always planning. Even at my wedding social a couple weeks back, I was unable to fully shut myself off; even though I had the exceptional effort and hard work of a friend to be "the guy" for the event. I still found myself assessing and reassessing trying to make certain everything was run as smoothly as possible. I believe anything has sooooo much potential for greatness that if adjusts can be made on the fly at the right time any event can be amazing. I really should find a line of work to utilize my analytical thinking so I could apply the efforts outside of my personal life.

I used to be able to have a blast anywhere, anytime with anyone. Now I find myself more subdued and low key. Not that low key is bad; many people live quite happily in low key mode. Now I find myself figure out who is there, what type person do I need to be too maximize the potential for a good time. Maybe I am a robot!?! Truthfully I would enjoy a little more bang for my buck. Let it all hang out type philosophy. Years ago when I was less wrapped up in life I was WAY more fun. Some of the people who have known me for the least amount of time don't even know that guy and think this is the normal me! Sad, but true.

I think a lot has to do with being a father. I am constantly worried about my image to them. And somewhere I missed the chapter that explains being fun is REALLY important. I know I am the least fun when I am "parenting", which sucks, because my kids are such goofballs at times I am missing out on the goofiness!! Although I feel a day and night responsibility to be an image of perfection for my children I have to relax so they can enjoy their father. For starters I am certainly nowhere near perfect! I am working on it and have made some leaps of faith. Doing something I know I will enjoy with them and letting go some of my reservations of "showing too much happiness" to them. It is such a weird way of thinking. Too much fun? Sounds so ridiculous, but I am stuck in this rut of monitoring my "vitals" and throttling back my fun for fear of being irresponsible. A parent…nothing and I mean nothing can prepare you for what kind of emotional roller coaster it sends you on. And I guess therein lies the problem…with all my planning, analyzing and break down of possibilities I can't put my finger on all the possibilities and outcomes when it comes to my kids. I think over time as I grew into being a parent I have spent too much time trying to find answers to questions that can't possibly have an answer that I got lost in the process. Your kids will grow up to be what they grow up to be and your input, although critical, is exactly that, just input. In the end, like all other humans, including us as we grew up, our children will make the final decisions on who they will be and how they will make their mark on Earth.

My Two Cents

Jamie

Peanuts Can Kill

Sounds very dramatic, I know. But the stark reality is peanuts can kill those who have an allergy.

My son, Mini-Me, has a nut allergy, along with asthma and other allergies. Mini-He is a well adjust kid and understands the dangers around him. He is smart and will always err on the side of caution, even if I have deemed something okay to eat.

Generally speaking we are very cool with the whole thing. We don't expect people who don't live with a severe allergy on a daily basis to be thinking about how their food choices affect Mini-He. That would not be fair. It's difficult to understand, I get that, but if I explain it someone shouldn't they get it at that point? What part of death don't they understand? I digress.

Kids Health is a great website that provides very well delivered information about the severity of peanut allergies. It is actually a resource site that offers many topics for parents and kids to enjoy. I have often tried to educate people to empower them to take ownership of their role in providing Mini-He a safe environment.

One of the most difficult aspects of dealing with the ignorance surrounding severe nut allergies is that people don't realize it isn't about the quantity. Any peanut residue is as deadly as a spoonful. That is a hard concept for others to grasp. Wikipedia provides a concise and clear explanation of what is happening in the body when peanuts are introduced. The next thing that is difficult and it goes hand in hand with the first point. There is a perception that if Mini-He doesn't eat the offending foods then he will be fine. So why does everyone else have to "suffer"? It is about transfer. We are all familiar with the CSI coined phrase secondary transfer; it is only used in every other episode of the 52 versions of CSI being aired on our TVs. But, yes, transfer; especially when children are eating. Kids get food everywhere when they eat. They wipe their grubby little paws on everything. Basically they handle foods with peanuts, touch 20 different surfaces, then eventually along comes Mini-He and he makes contact with the residue transfer. Mini-He then touches his own food and places it in his mouth and is enough to potentially kill him.

I am certainly not trying to blame anyone and it is always on Mini-He and us to ensure he is safe. I just wish people would try to be a little more understanding is all. Don't get me wrong, we have plenty of people in our lives that fully understand and look out for dangers. It only happens once in a blue moon that we encounter someone who is blatantly ignorant. It seems they are insulted by the idea of having to refrain from eating something. The attitude of "I'm NOT the one with the nut allergy!" is what confuses me. It is like the last half of the explanation, you know the part about the allergic person DYING never registers in their brain.

I encourage anyone who reads this post to take the time to educate yourself about Peanut/nut allergies. Below are a couple more links. Even if you don't deal with a peanut situation at the moment, being educated may help you, help someone else.

Asthma and Allergy Foundation of America

Mayo Clinic

My Two Cents

Jamie

Perfect Parent? Intro

I thought I would write a couple of blogs, a series if you will, about my perspective on parenting. Don't let the title mislead you. It is impossible to be a perfect parent, in fact it is impossible to be perfect at anything, especially when the rules are changing all the time. There isn't a book or any amount of advice that can give you the formula for being a good parent. It is all about trial and error (hopefully not too much error), adjusting on the fly and being open minded (not always my strongest asset).

I have to say first and foremost that parenting is a tough gig! Being a parent is the toughest job I have ever had. I always find it most intriguing when people who don't have children of their own make light the subject of parenting. They have all the answers, don't they? They role of parent is very different when you are submersed in the 24/7 nature of this beast. The long hours, sleepless nights and no pay (well at least not in the "paycheque" sense). No one would actually apply for a job posting that detailed the requirements for parenting! Parenting is the truest form of delayed gratification, loads of work up front with little reward; only to reap unlimited rewards on the backend.

Now of course I can only speak from the father's perspective and naturally only my experience. This isn't intended to be advice, but more my version of fatherhood thus far. I think parenting has a base line from which we can all launch from but shortly after liftoff you are on your own. For me, it wasn't until that shining moment of terrifying reality, oh about 6-12 hours before I left the hospital with my "bundle of joy", that I started to fully understand what I have got myself into. I replayed it over and over in my mind…"So, let me get this straight…this little tiny person who cannot survive without human intervention is my responsibility?? It doesn't go "home" after a long day? No matter how unhappy it is I can't return it? And…uuummmm…gulp…I am a father!?!" I can clearly remember the overwhelming fear welling up inside me as we walked to the car with my son (Mini-He); I don't think I have been that scared in all my life; I wasn't sure if I knew how to buckle a child seat right! The drive home was very quiet and odd. I couldn't stop thinking "We can't take him back now" "This is really happening" "What do I do next". We made it home, step one complete! Piece of cake, right?

Once I finally get home with junior that reality can blow your socks right off. THIS REALLY HAPPENING! I DON'T KNOW HOW TO BE A FATHER. And I quickly realize that all the advice I received for months previous is completely and utterly useless! Sure the advice would have been great if I was caring for the child of the person giving the advice, but I am caring for a distinctly unique individual person who has their own unique style and flair. All the advice, previous care giving, babysitting, education, written material and wives' tales you have heard or experienced WILL NOT give you an edge. Child raising techniques are going to be different for each child, they have to be.

I faced some pretty somber and humbling days in the first couple weeks. But Mini-He is going to 12 this year, so I guess something went right.

Whoa that is heavy stuff. I'm tired!

Next Post Stage 1 – First 3 months – Routine, Routine, Routine

My Two Cents

Jamie

Mini He Strikes Again!

For years I have been told my oldest Mini He looks “EXACTLY” like me. I haven’t ignored this claim or thought it to be false, but I never gave it much thought. Today that changed…

There we were waiting in line together at Tim Horton’s for an early morning father son breakfast. We were discussing what he would like and keeping pace with the steadily moving line. The nice young lady with some very shiny lips calls for us, as we are next. I place our order, trying to not be overly distracted by her shiny lips, Ooooo Aaaaahhhhh shiny. Considering I did manage to order the wrong beverage for Mini He, to which he; in his best Homer Simpson whisper, says through cupped hands, “that was supposed to be chocolate milk”. I correct my error and move on. At this point I notice the young lady (did I mention she has shiny lips?) is downright giddy. Was my ordering blundering really that entertaining? I hand her my money and as she is giving me my change she proclaims, “He looks exactly like you!”

She notices she has caught me off guard and I look like I am not sure I understand, I guess I stood there like a deer in the headlights; so she points at him and emphasizes her point. Okay I get, and honestly, now I am a little embarrassed! I thanked her for the comment, not sure why, did she mean I look like a 12 year old boy or he looked like an – ahem - “older” man!! For me it was an interesting start to the morning. Mini He is looking so much like me that strangers feel the need to point this out in manner that would suggest they feel we never knew. I am fine with the look a-like status, I can walk around with a puffed out chest saying, “Yup, that’s my boy!” For him on the other hand, not so sure, being 12 isn’t exactly easy and now strange people tell him he looks like his old man! YIKES! He must be thinking get me out of this twilight zone. We wandered over to sweating glass counters upon which we would receive Mini He’s breakfast choice. As we hurry up and wait, he seems to be all right with the lady’s comment, which puts my mind at ease. At least he didn’t run screaming from the restaurant, right? We proceeded to enjoy our little breakfast time and sewed up another little memory for safe keeping.

It is about the little memories. They are the ones that provide us simple joys in the years to come.

My Two Cents

Jamie

Children And Their Oh So Cool Ways

I described a situation in an earlier blog regarding how I usually dress appropriately for the weather and joked about the parental lecture that accompanies the concept of warm clothes in Winter. I spent a great deal of time this past winter trying to instill some solid principles about wearing warm clothes with my 11 year old son. Even to the extent of purchasing "cooler" outer ware to avoid any fashion disasters. He has some pretty good looking stuff to wear. Does he wear it? Hell no! That would make sense. Oh but don't worry Dads he has it in his backpack just in case it gets colder than -45 degrees. Are you kidding me? He has this very nice ski jacket apparently; which was purchased without a zipper, oh no, I was wrong, there it is. He, sadly, has not mastered the art of zipper closure. So he walks around being very cool (who are we kidding he has to be freezing his ass off) with his jacket open exposing the stylish choice of sweater for that day. :) Then of course there is the classic pulling of his hands into his jacket, which would indicate to any sane person that your hands are cold. So how about putting on those mitts you picked out because they were cool? Naaa, this pulling my hands in thing works better and looks cooler. So let me understand this...it is cooler to look like you have no hands, than it is to wear mitts on them? Okay, got it. How about one of the multiple toques he owns? Those are in his bag too, and besides those are for Summer when he is skate boarding, DUH!! The kid wears a toque all Summer long and tucks it away in his bag all Winter long for safe keeping! UGH! Now I will extend a friendly reminder; Hey don't forget your boots, you know the nice ones that look like snow board boots to keep up the cool image. I get thanked (not in a gracious way though) for reminding him. And as we walk through the ankle deep, freshly fallen snow I find as we approach the van that he has remembered his boots; of course they aren't on his feet, they are snuggly tucked up under his arm while he walks through the snow in his runners....oh wait....sorry his skate shoes.

Clearly I have no idea or concept of what it takes to be cool, but as far as I can tell it has a lot to do with being very cold, having wet socks, chapped skin on the hands and let's not forget the unique fashion accessory of winter boots under each arm. But I digress.

All I can say is, I will continue to try and help him understand it is important to dress properly for Winter and hope somewhere in his brain he hears me. At the very least he can pass along all this wisdom to his kids one day.

And of course, we all know that when we were youths we NEVER EVER under dressed for the weather in Winnipeg!

My Two Cents

Jamie

It Has Finally Happened, I Defended The Old Fashioned

My son is going to be 12 this year and I am not sure how that happened. No silly, I understand how it happened, but when did the baby become 12?

Yesterday we stopped off at Safeway for a an onion and some bread, what you don't stop and buy an onion and some bread? Anyway, we grab up the produce we need and the bread; we are now meandering through the store for nothing in particular (and I wonder why the kids hate going shopping-HA). I have to walk the length of the store, ya never know what might be on sale! But I digress. We are walking down the condiment aisle and my son points out to his sister (9), with great enthusiasm, "Look, they have old fashioned ketchup! The kind in the glass bottle!"

They stare and ogle this incredibly foreign container through which every kid's favorite dipping sauce/spaghetti sauce/fry topping/overall simple addition to any meal is displayed. After some very poignant conversation regarding the ketchups usefulness it is declared the "old fashioned" glass bottle is useless. I even believe the word hate was used.

The next course of events could have been somewhat out of body. I began to defend the glass bottle as if I were the inventor. Like some how my personal worth was tied to the glass ketchup bottle's acceptance. I begin to explain the glass bottle gets a raw deal because people don't know how to use it. I try and give them a physics lesson as we walk to find a register to pay for our things. I explain that the "secret" to glass bottles is NOT to tap the bottom of the bottle, but to tap the side of the bottle. With wonder and amazement, or perhaps a feeling of what the heck is this old guy talking about, my children listen in awe. I am going with awe for my own peace of mind. I continue my Physics 101 class, by tapping the side of the glass you are moving the ketchup to the side of the bottle allowing air to move up the bottle away from the opening and using gravity to push down on the ketchup. By tapping the top of the bottle you are pushing to opposing forces together, eventually the ketchup will come out but because your force is greater than the other two, but it can result in an 'explosion' of sorts.

Worst part, I would never buy a glass bottle of ketchup!!! I have to laugh. Kids are funny creature. They change your World so immeasurably it is astonishing.

Do I think I swayed their minds, nope! But I think I crossed a line I can't return from. I find comfort in things from years past even if I don't have a vested interest. I guess I ask myself does this make me old? I don't think so, but it was sure funny.

My Two Cents

Jamie