HA HA! You Lost Weight!

Anyone who has read anything on this blog knows I have lost a lot of weight. I accomplished this through exercise and lifestyle changes. No secret formula, no magic pills, nothing but the same tools we all have at our disposal. As strange as it has been to experience people's reaction to my transformation; I think the most unexplained occurrence is that of mockery. Usually this happens among those who have only known me as I am today. The tendency is to poke fun at my eating habits and, here's the kicker, the type of food I eat! I don't understand. Even after they know the story of where I came from to where I am, they still joke about it. "All you do is fill up on vegetables!", which isn't true, but if it was I'm still confused...is that a bad thing? "Oh are you having a carrot stick for lunch?" This statement in itself should help me move on because clearly they don't pay any real attention to my eating habits. I eat plenty of food, in fact, I am certain I eat more than I did before.” You eat constantly, mind you it’s just a cracker here and an apple there", okay…it seems that you are getting it, but not really. I eat "constantly" to fuel the metabolism; I am keeping the fires burning. Envision a car with only a five litre tank on a road trip across the country. How many times will the fuel tank of a machine in constant motion need to be filled? Get the picture?

Next, the opposing reaction from those who have known me for many years; clearly these people only see what they want to see. When sitting down to eat with family and long time friends, I am constantly questioned about the quantity of food I am eating. "Is that all you're eating? You hardly ate a thing!”. Truth of the matter is I had a little bit of everything; I get the benefits of tasting all the great food without piling the food high on my plate to the point of breeching the plate's holding capacity. As I have mentioned in my blogs before the size of the plates is a major component to the problems society faces today. We start a meal with a plate big enough to feed two people from and proceed to fill it up with enough food to feed four. In certain cases, like times when there is dessert available after dinner, I will eat less dinner. If I am going to stop eating when I am full then I better save room for cake! Bottom line the stomach will stretch as far as you want it to. This is not healthy for your body or its digestive processes. One of the changes I’ve made is to NOT jam food into my pie hole until I just can't get anymore in. I eat till I'm full and stop, then eat again when I feel hungry, which can be as little as an hour later, depending on the healthy qualities of the food consumed. But again this continued attempt to have me eat more food in one sitting is frustrating. Spend a day with me and understand how much food I eat, then you will realize I eat plenty, just not all at once. But that would require an actual interest in what I have accomplished and how I did it.

Another fun issue, is clothing sizes. I used to wear shirts that were XL or XXL. Baggy shirts were better to hide the enormous guy beneath them. A while back I was shopping with my wife trying to buy a few shirts that would actually fit me and she continued to suggest I try on the S size. My mind was asking "Is this woman nuts, I can't squeeze into a small?!" I was still dealing with the move to M and not mentally prepared for a further size reduction. I tried the small on and low and behold it fit! Not just fit either, comfortable fit and flattering! Who knew! I wear a medium in some styles of shirts and small in others. But Large is definitely too big. This concept never seems to get through to some people, myself included at times. It almost seems they are offended by the mere suggestion that I wear a medium or small? "C'mon you can wear a large. It's not THAT baggy." Then horrific phrase used in their defence is uttered "I like my clothes to be comfortable"…shudder…big clothes are the most unflattering thing anyone can do. The XLs of the World elongate the body and shorten your frame and more importantly make you appear much bigger than you are. I wore them because I had too and wanted to hide. The uncomfortable feeling being used as an excuse for proper fitting clothes is more in reference to not being comfortable with one's own skin or size than the clothes themselves. For us guys, I think a big part of it is linked to our ego. Big (strong) guys need to wear big shirts; if I wear an XL then I must be a big, strong man! Sadly that is not true for most cases. I know I am stronger today than I ever was, yet I wear clothes that are smaller than I have ever worn, go figure! Now I like how comfortable I feel wearing a medium or small. But again the battle to wear the clothes I want, in the size I want shouldn't be a battle, but it is.

For the most part none of above issues are things that truly upset me, but lately I have been taking issue with those same people complaining about their own health issues and desires for change. They are frustrated with my simple answers and lack of magic. Whoa, what, wait a minute….you are not happy with your health but you are more than willing to make fun of my lifestyle habits? Back up the bus amigo! Perhaps for just a second you should take the time to learn from me. Am I special in some way? I don't think so, but I DID change some very simple things about my lifestyle and have witnessed changes I would never have bet a wooden nickel on. So, my suggestion is shut your trap, buck up and take the challenge to make changes in your life! I've said it before, "If truly want to see change in your life you WILL have to make changes in your life." Usually the changes aren't easy ones either. Suck it up buttercup and realize change isn’t always easy or fun, but perhaps necessary if you truly want to experience change.

I don't know. I guess I feel my accomplishments are not having an impact on enough people. It sounds self centered, but really it’s the exact opposite. I want people I care about, quite frankly anyone really, to be healthy. The hard part is knowing what I have done is attainable by anyone. Again, nothing magically has taken place here. But, there was hard work and specific actions taken. My concern is how long it took me to figure it out and how I see others ignoring the obvious while maintaining the status quo, only to be frustrated and discouraged with their own health. They say, “Lead by example.” There is the rub; I continue to remain diligent about my own health while others around me continue to ignore theirs’. If my example is supposed to lead, how come the followers are few and far between?

It is time for me to learn how to find the value in my own accomplishments and realize how much my own health is worth.

My Two Cents

Jamie

A Picture Speaks a Thousand Words

I recently received a message from someone who I knew a long time ago. We worked together and through the glory that is Facebook they were able to lay witness to the changes I have made over the last year and half; through a photo I posted of my wife and I at a recent family wedding. The message came with an uplifting feel that reminded me how important my journey has been. Not just for me, but for those around me too.

I still forget that the changes my body has undergone since March '04 are completely beyond the scope of what I thought was possible, and I guess the same can be said for people who have known me over the years; both recently and a long time ago. At my current age I have met a lot of people; and this lifestyle change has created a situation where so many people have never seen me looking like I do now. Because I have never looked like this as an adult! It's kinda crazy really. Looking back to my High School days some 20 years ago, my body was shaped differently and I weighed more. Not much more mind you; my current weight is about 20lbs lighter than my weight in High School. I can't honestly recall a time when I weighed the same as I do today, nor can I remember my body's shape looking the way it does now either. Also, I can honestly claim that I NEVER thought I could actually weigh less than 200lbs. The concept was foreign and unattainable to me just a short time ago. I didn't feel the need to be less than 200lbs either. In fact I always joked with guys that "You aren't a real man unless you weigh at least 200lbs!" Quite a bold statement, from someone trying to make an excuse for being over weight. For me to now be well under 200lbs is shocking to me. It almost doesn't seem real. Whenever I do get on a scale (which isn't often) I still expect the much more than I see. I usually get off and step back on, thinking I must have did it wrong. I walk away from the scale shaking my head wondering if it is true. Luckily I don't own a scale so I don't have to worry about being confused ALL the time!

I am still caught off guard by comments from people regarding how I look. Especially those I have known for so long and not seen in a while. They have known me for years and they only know one version of me and he is much bigger. From the age of 16 to 36 is a long time of meeting new people and building bonds of friendship. Some of those people I see regularly and others not so much. It is the ones I happen upon infrequently that are most astonished. They clearly have a specific memory of me and today's version just doesn't match.

The interesting part of this is when someone I have met since the changes collides with someone who has known me for years. The frame of reference for my friends of many years confuses those who are new acquaintances and friends to my World. Naturally newer friends only know me as I am today (80 lbs lighter than before) and can't imagine me any different, whereas, my long time friends, family and acquaintances at a different time in my life couldn't imagine me as I am today. It's an interesting merger of mindsets that I am fascinated by. I'm weird, I know. I am student of people and that will never change. One group looks at me wondering where it all went and the other group looks at me and wonders where would it go!

I am encouraged by the thoughtful things I have heard from people around me. It reminds me why I took up the challenge...to regain control of my health. Its those comments and compliments that act as motivation to remain on task. Healthy, strong heart and active muscles. Two goals, one life. Simple enough? I think so. I keep it simple and don't sweat the small stuff………except when I'm exercising!

My Two Cents

Jamie

Am I That Important? I sure hope not!

As I write this I am torn. Am I really a terrible guy? I don't believe this to be true. Some might think so, which is really unfortunate.

There comes a time, seemingly annually now, when I feel forced to question my worth in life. I know I shouldn't but certain events always put me in a precarious spot. I believe I make a serious effort to be a good person, perhaps too good. What I mean by that is; I consistently try to accommodate everyone (except those seeking PC help). The problem is, from time to time, World's collide and I am only one man and cannot be everything to everyone and additionally not everywhere at the same time. Its intresting how people don't pick up on this. People and events get missed, mostly due to lack of planning and advance notice on the event planner's part. Does it suck, yes, sure it does, but doesn't life go on?
But why is everything hinging on my appearance? Or at least made to seem that way? Why is the entire success and everyone's chance at a good time resting on my shoulders? Am I that important? I hope not!
I find myself feeling a great deal of pressure at these times. If I am not available the event will be ruined! Which is absolute nonsense Not allowing myself to be effected by this is something I need to continue working on for my own mental health. But the fact remains; if I respond that I am unavailable due to other plans and this causes the wheels of that party bus to come off, something is wrong. Am I right?
I cannot and quite frankly will not believe that the success of the event and everyone's happiness hinges on my attendance! Seriously?! Its just not possible. Nor do I want it to be. I know I'm not that important! That isn't a negative statement either, I just don't believe I can wield so much power over others state of mind. So why then, do comments and ill feelings projected towards me lend to the very notion that I wield this unwanted burden?
I will boldly suggest that the problem lies on the otherside of the equation. I have written before about ownership of problems and the path to less stress is to assign proper ownership of issues. Only own your issues and ensure others own theirs. I think the time is fast approaching that my last unconquered frontier is dealt a harsh taste of reality. I cannot have ANY effect on the happiness (or disappointment) of others unless THEY CHOOSE to have my actions effect their happiness. They will have to own their unhappiness and NOT project it back on to me or others around them. Their choice to be unhappy or disappointed is an emotion they own and must deal with it appropriately. Least of which is trying to pawn the emotion off on someone else rather than feel it themselves and process it.
Delve in to the feelings and realize no hurtful intentions exist and therefore a logical response would be to let it go and enjoy life and its glorious splendor. View the event as a missed opportunity for those not in attendance and a great time for those there. Its counter productive to constantly look at life based on what you don't have.
I cannot continue to allow others to assign their unresolved issues to me. Thus, projecting their feelings on to me, in an attempt to have me be the problem, to attempt to make me in to a bad guy.
I truly feel I am doing a good job of taking care of my responsibilities in my life AND living within the choices that have brought me to where I am today. I don't make excuses for my life choices nor do I expect anyone else to. I choose to find happiness in the choices, even the really, really tough ones. Are mistakes made absolutely, but moving forward is the only option. Moving back is impossible.

My Two Cents

Jamie
Sent from my BlackBerry device on the Rogers Wireless Network

Should I mention why?

I wonder if it is worth mentioning why I have been absent for so long? Who has noticed? Not sure I have enough (or any readers) that have found a void in their life due to my absence.
Honestly there isn't one specific reason either. I just had work to do finding a job and didn't have time or motivation to write anything. Lately I have found myself thinking about writing again and have ignored the urge. I should have entered my thoughts into the journal I started, but didn't. There is a bunch of stuff I need to revisit from that book and I should be writing again.
As you will have noticed I seem to have the ability to post from my Blackberry, which is kinda cool if you ask me! Then I can write when the moment strikes me and perhaps be a little more timely. I suppose I don't want to post too many a day if I get soap box happy and load up the page with crap! I really hope to keep the content worth reading and coming back for. Who knows maybe I can have a following, minions, I've always wanted minions!

Really who wouldn't want some minions to do some dirty work, like read my boring diatribes in cyberspace!

My Two Cents,
Jamie

Recession Proof?

Well, about a week ago I was laid off. Although I understood the possibility was there working for a Canadian manufacturing company, I still didn't see it coming.
It seems to have set in this morning. I should have been busting out this blog when I had the chance. Hind sight always 20/20.
It has been a hurricane of emotions, not too worried to what the hell am I going to do. Not that I worried about finding employment, mostly trying to figure out what the heck I want to do.
The Information Technology (I.T.) industry was cool, but I am not sure it is for me. I haven't written it off, but I definitely need a much bigger challenge than I had. For me I need opportunity to be creative and to think outside the box. I am a proactive thinker always striving for a better way to do things. Sometimes there isn't that is cool too. But if there is a better way I will find it, given enough time.
For now I will try to bring some life back to my blog, re-read some of the blog building research I have and see what comes of it.
Today I cast out the lines and see what type of fish are biting. When one door closes many more always open, the trick is to be alert and notice them.

My Two Cents